


clara

by laurenjauregui



Series: you make me sick (for being so perfect) deleted scenes [1]
Category: Fifth Harmony (Band)
Genre: F/F, autistic!lauren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-16
Updated: 2017-03-16
Packaged: 2018-10-06 07:23:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10329191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurenjauregui/pseuds/laurenjauregui
Summary: Clara Jauregui has a hard time accepting that her eldest daughter is a little different. (Basically Lauren and Clara's mother/daughter relationship.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning for ableist slurs, emotional/physical abuse.

“After enough assessment, it’s safe to say that your daughter is autistic.”

While she hears her mother’s sharp intake of breath, the doctor’s words don’t really mean anything to Lauren. She doesn’t care about that, she just wants to get home so she can watch _The Lion King_. She hasn’t watched it since last week, so she’s going to try and ask her mom when she gets home.

“No, that’s not right,” Clara shakes her head, “she’s just… a little delayed… she’ll be alright in a few years’ time.”

“I’m sorry, but that’s not the case,” the doctor continues, “I’m afraid she might never progress past this point. Her language development is especially delayed and it’s likely she’ll never speak more than she does now.”

“Lauren, sweetheart,” At her mother’s voice, Lauren looks up. “Say something. Copy after me, okay?”

Clara says something else, but Lauren, disinterested, goes back to playing with Nala. In her four year old mind, whatever her mom is saying isn’t that important. _The Lion King_ , however, is.

The doctor explains more things to her mom, but Lauren doesn’t pay much attention. She hopes that maybe her mom will take her to Toys R Us if she’s good, because she tries her best to make her mom smile, because Clara never usually looks that happy around her.

“Mami,” Lauren looks up after a few moments, “mami, _hakuna matata_.”

Clara ignores her, busy talking – more like arguing – with the doctor, and telling him that he can’t be right. “I can’t have- she’s not _retarded_.”

Lauren pauses at the word and looks up at her mother with a frown. “Mami?”

The doctor frowns. “That’s a derogatory term and I don’t think you should refer to your own child in that way. It’s not her fault. She’s autistic, and as a parent, you’re going to have to adjust.”

Clara huffs. “Are you going to prescribe her something? Make her normal?”

“That’s not how it works.” The doctor says, handing Clara some pamphlets. “Look through these. I’ve included one for a good school in the area for kids with special needs, since she’s around school age.”

After that, he ushers them out of his office, and Lauren looks up to see her mom on the phone. She doesn’t know who she’s talking to, but she says _Mike_ a lot, so she thinks it could be her dad, and that makes her happy. She really loves her dad.

After a few moments, Clara scoops her up into her arms, and Lauren kicks out, because she doesn’t like being picked up unless it’s by her abuela. She wriggles to get free, and Clara hangs up the phone and says sharply, “ _Lauren_ , stop being so difficult.”

Lauren squirms even more. “Down.”

Clara huffs, and doesn’t put her down until they’re at the car and she’s strapping her into her car seat. Lauren doesn’t like her car seat much, and the seatbelts hurt her neck, but she plays with Nala to distract herself and ignores the sad look on her mom’s face for now.

(Maybe they can watch _The Lion King_ together. That’ll make her happy, Lauren thinks.)

“ _Hakuna matata?_ ” Lauren asks, hoping that her mom will understand what she means. “Mami?”

“No,” Clara firmly responds. “We’re not watching that movie. No more TV. We’re going to put you right, Lauren. We’re going to fix this.”

Lauren feels tears welling up in her eyes. “ _Hakuna matata!”_

“ _Just shut up_!” Clara shouts, and Lauren’s hands shoot up to cover her ears. She knows she’s crying now, because she doesn’t like it when people shout at her. She hates loud noises. “Be quiet until we get home.”

Lauren sniffles and wipes at her eyes, but obeys, because she’s scared of her mom when she’s shouting.

Once they get home, she runs to her bedroom and sits on her bed, petting Nala’s fur and humming to herself, because she’s still upset that her mom shouted. After a few minutes alone, Clara comes upstairs and sits down on the bed next to her. “Lauren. I’m sorry for shouting in the car.”

Lauren blinks down at her feet and nods in reply. Clara keeps talking. “I know you didn’t understand much of what happened at the doctor’s, but they lied to us, sweetheart. They said that you’re- that you’re something you’re not, but it’s okay. We’ll get you caught up to everyone else your age, but you really have to try.”

Lauren looks up, staring at the wall next to her mom’s head. “ _Hakuna matata?”_

“No distractions, Lauren,” Clara shakes her head, “we can’t let you get left behind everyone. Because you’re a nice, normal kid.”

“Diff’ent,” Lauren answers, because that’s what her abuela says. Her abuela says she’s different, but it’s okay. “’buela.”

“I know what your abuela thinks,” Clara huffs, “and I know that taking you to the doctor was her idea, but I don’t think- you can’t be like that. I don’t think I could deal with that.”

Lauren frowns at her. “Mami… ‘buela- ‘buela-”

“Your abuela is wrong,” Clara answers curtly, “and so is the doctor.”

Lauren shifts, but shrugs absently. “ _Hakuna matata_? P’ease?”

Clara huffs, but stands up from the bed. “Come on. One time only, okay?”

Lauren beams and follows her mom out of the room with a smile.

-

The next few months are difficult, according to her mom.

Lauren isn’t really sure what that means, but she tries her best to do all the learning her mom had given her, but writing is confusing and most of the questions don’t make sense in her head. Her mom makes her talk a lot, too, and she’s really trying with that, but her mom always says it’s not good enough.

Her fifth birthday comes and goes, and she doesn’t have a party like she sees kids do on TV, because Lauren doesn’t have any friends. She never made any, because her parents didn’t enrol her in a preschool and she’s not starting school this year. Her parents had argued about that – they’ve been arguing lots lately – because both of her parents wanted her to go to a different school and start at different times.

Lauren doesn’t care much about that. She doesn’t like her parents shouting at each other, and when her mom is upset, she shouts at Lauren, too. Most of the time, Lauren doesn’t know what she’s done wrong, but she tries to be better, because she doesn’t like the way her mom shouts. She wants her mom to smile all the time like she does when she’s looking after Chris.

One day, she walks into the living room, knowing that it’s time for her mom to make her talk lots because of the schedule her mother had drawn up, and she finds Clara reading through lots of papers. Lauren can’t read very well yet, but she’s best at that, so she tries to look at the papers, but the words are too big. She sounds out _a-dop-ton_ and _in-sit-tuton_ in her head, not sure that’s right, and watches as her mom pushes a picture of a big building towards her from the mess of papers on the couch.

“Do you like the look of that house, Lauren?” Clara asks, and Lauren stares at it, shaking her head. It looks quite sad, she thinks. “You don’t? What about-”

She pauses to rifle through some more paper, and finally passes Lauren another pamphlet. “What about this one?”

Lauren frowns. She quite likes the house she’s in now, so she doesn’t want to go to the other ones and doesn’t know why her parents are suddenly asking her about moving houses. Her dad had argued a lot with her mom this past week – she’d heard them shouting, and Clara had said things like ‘ _I can’t deal with this anymore’_ and Mike had shouted ‘ _you don’t get to ship her off’_ , but Lauren hadn’t really cared what they were talking about.

(She’s happy, because her abuela had been seeing her a lot lately, and she always lets her watch her favourite shows and movies and doesn’t tell her mom about it.)

After a few minutes of staring at the picture of the second building, Lauren shakes her head. “No.”

“Well, we’ll find one you like,” Clara says, “we’re going to go for a visit and meet the nice people in the first two, though. They might be able to help you and look after you.”

Lauren looks at the pamphlets again and then puts them aside, because if her mom isn’t going to make her do talking, maybe she can watch _The Lion King_. It’s been so long since she’d been allowed to watch it at home, and she misses sitting on the couch with her mom and watching it, because it’s the only time she cuddles with her mom.

“ _Hakuna matata_?” Lauren asks, sitting on the couch next to her mom. She pushes the _a-dop-ton_ and _in-sit-tuton_ papers to the floor and moves closer. “ _Hakuna matata,_ mami?”

“I guess since you might be…” Clara sighs and glances down at the papers. Lauren notices that one of them is a form, but she doesn’t care about those. She helped her dad fill one out at the hospital when he hurt his arm, but she doesn’t know much else about forms, and she wasn’t sure that her mom was hurt like her dad had been. “You _have_ been good today, so you can watch it.”

Lauren beams, and her mom moves over to the TV, rifling through the DVD drawer. Lauren waits on the couch, and when her movie starts, Clara sits back down. Lauren smiles again, and deciding to say what she’s been practicing, cuddles up to her mom. “’ove you, mami.”

Clara’s sharp intake of breath takes her off guard. “You- _Lauren_ \- who taught you that?”

“’buela,” Lauren proudly replies, “’ove you, ‘ove you, ‘ove you!”

Clara pulls Lauren into a tight hug, and for once, Lauren doesn’t really mind much. Mostly because her movie is on. She hears her mom sniffling, and she looks up to see tears in her eyes. She frowns, because she hadn’t meant to upset her.

“No,” Lauren wipes at her mom’s eyes, “no sad.”

 “They’re happy tears, Lauren,” Clara explains, pulling her onto her lap and rocking her back and forth. Lauren giggles, because she loves being rocked, that’s why she likes sitting in her abeula’s rocking chair. “I love you too, sweetheart. So much.”

Later that night, Lauren sees her mom throwing the _a-dop-ton_ and _in-sit-tuton_ papers in the fire. She doesn’t think much of it, and goes to find her dad, because she’s more interested in having a chocolate milkshake before bed.

Once her dad makes her a milkshake, she walks into the lounge and sits down next to her mom, who is still burning all of the papers. She likes the way they melt into the flames, and she thinks it looks pretty, but she knows not to play with fire, because that’s bad.

Clara notices her after a few moments. “Lauren, get back from the fire, please.”

Lauren shuffles backwards, but her mom picks her up – she whines in protest – and puts her on the couch. “Stay here. I don’t want you getting burned.”

Lauren points at the fire. “ _’dop-ton_ paper.”

Clara stares at her in shock as Lauren sips on her milkshake, happily drinking it up with her bendy straw. “Lauren, baby, you don’t need to worry about that. We’re not- you’re staying right here with us, okay?”

Lauren blinks at her and tilts her head to the side in confusion. She doesn’t know what her mom is talking about, because why would she go anywhere? She’s only five, she’s not old enough to drive yet. “’tay?”

“Yes,” Clara pulls Lauren onto her lap, and the five year old whines in protest, squirming to get away. At least, until her mom lifts her shirt up a little and starts gently rubbing her tummy, and Lauren relaxes into her hold, humming to herself. “You’re not going anywhere. I was going to do a bad thing, and that’s why your dad and I were fighting.”

“Bad?” Lauren frowns and shakes her head. “Mami, no bad! ‘ood!”

“I love you so much, Lauren. You’re my little girl. I want what’s best for you, and I thought someone else might be able to do better for you.” Clara rocks her and Lauren buries her head in her mom’s neck, listening to her pulse. “You’re so difficult sometimes and I don’t know how- how to deal with it.”

Lauren blinks up at her. “I- I bad?”

Clara doesn’t reply, and hushes her, until Lauren gets uncomfortable and squirms out of her mom’s grip. She’s finished her milkshake, anyway, so she needs to go to bed now.

Her mom looks sad again, so she toddles over and gives her a goodnight kiss on the cheek, before padding down the hallway to her room.

-

A month later, Lauren is left with her aunt, and she’s hurt and shaken and won’t say a word at her abuela’s house. When her parents make it home, cutting their trip short, Lauren worries that her mom might shout, because she’d told her not to ruin their anniversary, and making them come home might’ve ruined it.

Instead, her mom pulls her into her arms and holds her tightly, murmuring, “I was so worried about you, sweetheart. I’m so sorry I left you with her.”

“Mami,” Lauren croaks out, her back still stinging in pain, “’ove you, mami.”

“I love you too,” Clara promises her. “I love you so much.”

-

It’s a bad day.

Lauren knows because she had another ‘tantrum’ today. That’s what her mom calls them. And she knows that her mom is angry, because Lauren had scratched her by accident. She didn’t mean to hit out, but her mom was grabbing at her and it hurt so much.

Clara drags her to the car while Lauren is mid meltdown, and she’s muttering under her breath, but Lauren can’t understand what she’s saying because everything is twisting together in her head. When she’s back in the car and not in the crowded mall, Lauren manages to calm down, because she takes in the quiet and keeps her eyes closed.

She’s not calm for long, though, because Clara is shouting already. “I can’t believe you showed me up like that! We were just talking to one of my friends, she didn’t do anything to you!”

“Loud,” Lauren tries to get out, putting her hands over her ears. “Loud!”

“Give me a fucking break,” Clara huffs, glaring at her. “I should’ve sent you away when I had the chance. You ruined everything and I’m sick of having to deal with a retarded kid. It’d be so much easier for _everyone_ if you weren’t around, especially for me. Why can’t you just be _normal_? What did I do to deserve any of this? God, I wish you were never born.”

Everything is silent for a moment, but her mom’s words sink in and Lauren bursts into tears, shaking her head and pushing the car door open, running away from her mom. The words follow her, ringing in the back of her head. _I wish you were never born_.

Does that mean her mom doesn’t love her? Because Lauren really tries to make her happy, but nothing she does ever seems to work.

Lauren doesn’t know how long she runs for, but she hides in an alleyway away from all the people and makes herself as small as possible, whimpering in fright when she hears her mom calling out for her. She’s scared, and she doesn’t want her mom to find her, because what if she hurts her like her aunt did?

Eventually, her mom’s voice starts to fade away, and she’s shaking a little less from fear and more from the cold. She doesn’t have a coat, and it’s winter, so it’s already starting to get dark, but she _can’t_ go to her mom, because she’ll hurt her, and Lauren doesn’t want to be hurt.

It’s almost pitch black and she’s shivering when someone comes out of a side door of one of the buildings and into the alleyway, and their eyes widen when they notice her. It’s a teenage girl, with kind eyes, but Lauren still stares up at her in fear.

“Are you lost, sweetie?” The girl asks, kneeling down next to her. Lauren backs away instinctively. “What’s your name?”

After a few moments, Lauren looks down at her feet and stutters out, “I- I Lauren.”

“Lauren,” the girl repeats. “That’s a pretty name. I’m Britt. Now, are you lost, Lauren?”

“I- I,” Lauren looks away. “I- hide.”

“You’re hiding?” Britt frowns and points towards the door. “Would you like to come inside? We’re just closing, but you can wait in the warm.”

After a few moments, Lauren nods, and follows Britt in through the door and into what looks like a coffee shop. Britt leads her over to one of the couches by the fire and points to it. “You can sit down there. It’s really warm.”

Lauren nods, and sits down on the comfy couch, liking the warmth of the fire. Britt walks away, and Lauren watches after her for a moment, but she’s not gone long, and returns with an older woman.

The woman kneels down next to her and sends her a warm smile. “Are you lost?”

“Hide,” Lauren answers, looking down at her feet. “Hide.”

The woman frowns. “Who are you hiding from?”

“Mami,” Lauren replies, tears welling up in her eyes, “scary.”

Britt smiles. “How old are you, Lauren?”

Lauren holds up five fingers, like her dad had taught her on her birthday, and kicks her legs back and forth, because they don’t quite touch the ground.

The older woman asks her another question, but Lauren spots a phone and toddles over to it, trying her best to reach it, but it’s too high on the counter for her. Britt gets it down for her.

After a few moments, Lauren dials her abuela’s number and waits for someone to pick up. When her abuela’s worried voice answers the phone with, “is there any news yet?” Lauren just frowns to herself. She doesn’t watch the news, that’s for grownups.

“’buela!” Lauren says into the phone, and she hears a loud, ‘ _it’s Lauren!_ ’ on the other side of the phone. “’buela, loud.”

“Lauren, sweetheart, where are you?” Her abuela asks. “Do you know where you are?”

“Britt,” Lauren says, because she knows who she’s with. Then, she holds out the phone to the two women, and Britt takes it from her and starts talking to her abuela and explaining.

Lauren goes to sit back down, and once she finishes the phone call, Britt sits next to her and tells her a really interesting story about princesses. Ten minutes later, and the front door to the coffee shop bursts open, and her dad is the first person she sees.

“Papi!” Lauren beams and runs over to him, letting him pick her up. “Papi, hi!”

“We were so worried about you,” Mike hugs her tightly. “Don’t ever run off again. You scared your abuela so much, too.”

Mike sets her down, and Lauren feels bad that her abuela was worried, because her abuela is one of her favourite people in the world and she doesn’t want to make her sad.

“Oh my god, Lauren!”

When she hears the voice, she tenses up and hides behind her dad’s leg. “No.”

Clara comes to a stop in front of her and reaches out to pull her in for a hug, but Lauren jumps back, shaking her head, tears already brimming in her eyes. She stares down at her feet, and backs against a wall as Clara approaches, crying out, because she knows she’s going to get hurt.

Britt gets in between them. “I don’t think you should go near her.”

“I’m her _mother_ ,” Clara folds her arms across her chest, “she’s my daughter and we’re going home. We appreciate you finding her, but-”

“She said she was hiding from you,” Britt interrupts. “And that you were scary.”

Lauren runs to hide behind her dad, who stares at Clara in shock. “You just said she ran away. You didn’t tell me you’d done something.”

“I’ll explain at home.” Clara curtly replies, and Mike picks Lauren up. The five year old hides her face in her dad’s shoulder when her mom approaches and shakes her head.

Mike stares at Clara. “She’s terrified of you. Look, she’s shaking.”

“It’s not- I’ll explain at home.” Clara says, and heads out of the door.

Mike rubs comforting circles into Lauren’s back. “It’s okay. We’ll get you home and I’ll make you a milkshake and we’ll put _The Lion King_ on. Okay?”

Lauren wipes at her eyes and nods. “ _Hakuna matata_.”

When they get home, her dad brings the DVD into Lauren’s room and sets it up on his laptop, telling her to stay in her bedroom and watch the movie and to shout if she needs anything.

The laptop’s sound is quite loud, but it doesn’t cancel out the noise of her parents arguing downstairs. She can hear her dad and Clara arguing, Clara saying things like _‘I didn’t mean it, just let me talk to her’_ and Mike shouting back, but Lauren bundles under her blankets and really hopes that her mom won’t come upstairs.

She doesn’t want to get hurt.

-

Lauren doesn’t talk to Clara for a month.

When she comes into the room, Lauren runs away, and when she’s at her abuela’s for dinner one night and her mom is the one to arrive and pick her up, Lauren locks herself in the upstairs bathroom and refuses to come out until she’s gone.

“Hates m-me,” Lauren stutters when her abuela coaxes her out of the bathroom, “ruin- ruin mami. Mami sad. M-my fault.”

“No, Lauren,” Her abuela rocks her in her chair, “your mami loves you, she really does. She’s so upset that you won’t talk to her, but I do think she needs to give you time to settle down, because she said some horrible things to you, nena. And none of it is true. I’d be so sad if you weren’t around.”

Lauren cuddles up to her abuela. “Normal? W-want- no- no, um, _r-retar-tarded-_ ”

“Lauren Michelle, don’t you dare say that word again,” Her abuela scolds her, “you’re not that, and it’s a bad thing to call someone that’s different like you. You’re so clever. Not many kids your age have phone numbers memorised. You’re going to grow up to be so smart.”

Lauren sniffles and shakes her head. “Want- want _normal_. Mami- mami love me then.”

“Your mami loves you already, I promise,” her abuela says, pulling her close. “You _are_ normal, Lauren. You’re one of the sweetest little girls I’ve ever met, and your mami misses you so much. That’s why she came to pick you up tonight. She really wants to talk to you because she loves you a lot.”

Lauren whines into her abuela’s shoulder. “Want Nala.”

She cuddles with Nala in her abuela’s rocking chair until her dad arrives to pick her up and take her home. When she gets home, she goes straight to her room, and while she’s playing with Nala on her bed, there’s a knock on the door and her mom walks in.

Lauren cowers away from her, shaking her head and letting out a whine in protest. Clara doesn’t try to pick her up like she always used to, and instead sits gingerly on the edge of the bed. Lauren jumps off and backs into a corner.

“Lauren, sweetheart, please listen to me.” Clara says, and Lauren pulls Nala up to her chest and closes her eyes in fear. “I’m so, so sorry, honey. I didn’t mean to shout at you, and I’m sorry I let my temper get the best of me. Your abuela has mentioned that you’re afraid I’m going to hurt you, and I’d never do that. You’re my daughter and I love you so much, I would never hurt you.”

Lauren groans and shakes her head, but Clara pushes through. “I know we’ve never had the best relationship, but you’re only five and we can fix that. I’m so sorry for the things I said. You’re one of the best things that’s ever happened to me, and I love you regardless of your… of your autism. I love you so much and I just want you to talk to me. I don’t want you to cower away like I’m going to hit you.”

When Lauren stays silent, Clara sighs, but it’s not in the usual way. She turns around to Lauren with teary eyes. “I’m going to let you come to me. But… I bought a present for you, and I’m going to leave it on your bed. Okay?”

Lauren stays in her corner until Clara leaves, and when she’s sure she won’t come back, Lauren gets up and toddles over to her bed, sitting down. She eyes the gift bag warily, not sure what it’s going to be, but decides to open it.

She pulls out the purple tissue paper and blinks in surprise at what she finds. A stuffed Simba to match her Nala. She pulls the new toy into her arms and cuddles it up to her chest, the fur a lot softer than Nala’s because it’s new, but Nala will always be her favourite.

She plays with the stuffed lion’s tail and claps her hands three times, because she really likes this present. She decides that even though she’s afraid, she’s going to say thank you to her mom.

So, leaving Nala on her bed and patting the toy on the head to assure her that she’ll be back soon, she heads out of her bedroom and finds her mom in the lounge, confused when she sees her crying. “Mami?”

Clara looks up in surprise when she hears Lauren’s voice. “Lauren?”

“I- I- um,” Lauren stammers, looking down at her feet, “tank you.”

She holds out Simba to try and show what she’s talking about, and her mother sends her a rather watery smile. “You like him?”

“Uh huh,” Lauren pets the toy, and anxiously, she steps a little closer and points to the TV. “ _Hakuna matata?”_

“I’d love to watch it with you, Lauren.” Clara replies and and gets off the couch, digging around the drawer for the DVD. Lauren taps against her leg and sits down on the far end of the couch, waiting for the movie to start up.

When Clara sits down on the opposite side of the couch, Lauren moves a little closer, staring at her mother in apprehension. “Mami?”

Clara looks over at her with a warm smile. “What’s wrong, sweetie?”

“Um- um… you-” Lauren points to her chest, “you hate.”

“I could never hate you, Lauren,” Clara says, “I said those mean things in a moment of anger. I didn’t mean them, okay? I love you so much and even- even if you never improve from where you are now… I’ll love you unconditionally.”

Lauren shuffles a little closer. “Um… I- I normal?”

“No,” Clara shakes her head, “you’re more than normal. You’re the most exceptional little girl in the world, and I love you so much.”

“I…” Lauren bites down on her bottom lip, “um… tummy?”

“You want me to rub your tummy?” Clara asks, and Lauren nods. Her mother beams at her, and when Lauren clambers into her lap, she kisses the top of her head. “I love you so, so much.”

Lauren finally smiles. “’ove you, mami. Mami no hate.”

“No,” Clara brushes Lauren’s hair back, “I could never.”

-

“Mom, we need to go!”

Clara blinks in surprise when she hears Lauren’s voice. “Oh, sorry, Lauren. Just thinking. I’ll grab the car keys.”

Lauren holds out her graduation cap and gown. “I’m- I’m going to wait until I’m at Camila’s until I change. She’s waiting for me, so…”

“Lauren,” Clara looks over at her daughter and spots the piece of paper in her left hand – Lauren’s valedictorian speech. “I’m so proud of you.”

“I know, you’ve told me exactly seventeen times.” Lauren answers, rocking on her heels. “In the past three hours.”

Clara laughs and reaches out to take her daughter’s hand. “I don’t mean for being valedictorian. I mean in general. How far you’ve come. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Lauren.”

Lauren smiles and gives her an awkward hug. “What about Chris and Taylor? They’re important too. You know that Taylor got an A on her physics homework? And Chris- Chris is probably going to get a scholarship for basketball.”

“I know that, and I love you all the same and I’m proud of both of them,” Clara answers, “but you’ve come so far from the little four year old who could say around fifty words.”

Lauren blinks in confusion. “Camz always says that. Apparently I’m more confident now, which I agree with. And you- you’ve come far too. You used to- you never understood. But you do now. And I’m so- I’m just really happy with my life how it is right now. You understand me and- and I have an amazing girlfriend and I’m- I’m just… _content_. You know?”

“I’m so glad you have Camila,” Clara says with a smile. “But my little girl is going to be valedictorian. Your abuela would be so proud. I wish she could be here.”

“She is here,” Lauren smiles, and puts her hand over her mother’s heart. “In there. Two lives, mami. People have two lives because they live through memories. And… and she’s watching over us. She’ll be at my graduation in spirit and she’ll be there to see me make my speech.”

Clara pulls Lauren in for a hug. “Yeah, you’re right. She’ll be there with us.”

“Anyway, can we go now?” Lauren asks. “I’d like to get to Camila’s in good time, because I haven’t seen her properly for a few days and I miss her, but I don’t want to be a weird clingy girlfriend. So I want to go.”

Clara watches her daughter head out of the room with a smile, her graduation cap and gown in one hand and her valedictorian speech in the other.


End file.
